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I Don't Believe Anyone Who Says They're Not Hungry

I was once asked if I followed any particular rules when it comes to cooking.

Yeah,” I replied. “I never believe anyone who says they’re not hungry in my house.”

Take for example what just transpired here. It was getting way past lunch time and my wife was working in her upstairs “work at home” office while our dog finished her third nap of the day nearby. I texted her to ask if she had an interest in some breakfast sandwiches I was going to make.

“No,” she said. “I had oatmeal earlier in the day.”

Sticking with oatmeal when you can have a fresh, hot breakfast sandwich is a topic for another day, but let’s just say I remembered rule number 1 and thought “I don’t believe you.”

So I went in the kitchen and started frying some sweet Italian sausage patties. I took out my mandolin and sliced a Vidalia onion and a sweet yellow pepper very thinly. The onions and peppers went into a saute pan, and I cooked them over medium heat until they got very soft and lightly browned.

By then, I heard the sound of my wife and a large dog coming down the steps.

The aroma from the kitchen had alerted TWO sets of taste buds.

“Well, maybe that would be good. Maybe I’ll have one,” I next heard.

So as the peppers and onions finished, I added four eggs and cooked them together. Four slices of bread went into the toaster. American cheese and a jar of mayo came out of the fridge.

To do a breakfast sandwich right, I use Italian bread because it’s wider than regular bread. I put a slice of American cheese on the bottom piece of toast, partly for flavor but partly because it melts quickly. When you put the sausage on top of it, it serves as a glue once melted that holds the sausage in place.

On top of the sausage goes another slice of American cheese, again for the same reasons. I then use the spatula to form a piece of egg, onion and pepper mixture that’s about the same size of the bread and place that on top of the pile. Then I use a light coating of mayo, again for flavor and to act as a glue to hold the top of the sandwich together.

Once assembled, I put it on the chopping board, cut it into triangles and put it on a plate. I would normally add some fruit to make the plate look nice, but my customer upstairs specifically requested express delivery. So upstairs it went.

A minute later I heard “this is REALLY good.”

And to think she would have settled for oatmeal.

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Sunday, 06 December 2020
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